Hey Dorks I'm Writing Your Missed Connection For You

Manhattan-bound L Train. It's Monday, 10:37AM. You're both late for work, woops. Or maybe not, dude has NO bag, and girl, where you off to, Union Sq. Petco? No judgments, I'm wicked staring at both of you like a murderer so I'm the silly one. You're reading your favorite books! The first books in their respective series. Nice. Lady: Pink leggins, bitchin green boots. You have so much gear all over you. You're almost sucking on your own fingers, careful! Brah: You are reading on the toilet, basically. Regular dude clothes, you look nice! Very Neo's Residual Self Image. But sit up! You're both reading soooo fast, like 20-second pages. I wish you'd slow down and look at one another. If you locked eyes for a second, you'd definitely have a moment. It would be magical.

Now's your chance. Get at me, I'll hook you two up. I'm really pulling for you guys. You're both kinda sweaty. Me too.

Love, Patrick