Mister Field Trip: The New Museum

Art is a hard thing to talk about but I have a pretty wide definition for it. I'd say it's anything that activates the critical senses. So yeah, basically anything. Having said that, I'm about to contradict that notion with some impotent hating. Let's go to the New Museum!

TNM has an exhibit up right now called The Generational: Younger Than Jesus, which is the worst name ever. It features the work of 50 artists all, you know, younger than etc.

Alternate title of show: Art By People 33 And Under. 33 is younger than Jesus, but it aint no Miley Cyrus either. Or Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart since we're using big names. 33. That is how old our parents (ahem, one generation ago) were when they were married and had children and careers and houses. You know. Adults.

But cool I get you. Bring on the rich and intricate.

Spiral Staircase To Nowhere. Materials: Spiral Staircase.

This artist hired a model to meditate (sleep) in a bed. My roommate in college did this for a show too but she was naked. Doesn't every college have one of these?

The iGeneration (cringe) loves big halftones. When you're younger than the Son of God, it's basically your job to be all about halftones.

Speaking of God,

Ha Ha Ha! Being young is the best! It totally doesn't matter! Go Millennials!

The hallmark of all children of the 80s: The Collage. COME ON, DUDE. Way to glue a Time Magazine to some foam core, lazybones.

Listen up, my fellow Generation Me's (and 33 year olds): everyone knows mannequins are one of the laziest, go-to props in modern art. People older than Jesus are over this trick, and now you know, and knowing is half the etc.

Guess who just flipped the script on how to hang a photograph on the wall. That person who's 31.

Gen Y Pop (Art) Quiz. Was this in the gallery or in the cafe? I'll never tell. 

I was heading toward the exit, thinking to myself: man, this exhibit is really literal and heavy-handed and entitled. Then I got to the exit and saw this.

That's a 30 foot banner. Is it possible for a building to have a Peter Pan complex? They should've had a second banner that said: "BUT DO PAY US $12." At least then we'd all be in on the joke.

I didn't take pics of everything, but there was stuff I liked also. Someone did a really detailed Where's Waldo painting but of the British Empire and most of the videos are fun to watch. Also - and this is my favorite - one museum security guard is always wearing an Adidas track suit with blood on it. No explanation.

Also, there was banana peel on the floor five feet out from one of the walls. I couldn't tell if that was exhibit or not, but hey. Ha (for the kids [us]).

There was a massive wall of drawings that looked radical until it turned out the artist's grandmother drew all of them and the young artist just videotaped her doing it. Psh. Laaaazy.

Was taking lazy pills one of the requirements for getting work shone?

Oh also, there's totally that video installation of a dude in drag breaking picture frames with a hammer. You know what I'm talking about, right?

I realize it's pretty bad form to trash other people's art, but then again, no it's not. It's art. On display. For money.